The Family Home

We're currently staying at my in-laws apartment and the place M called home for 30 years.  It's a very simple 2-bedroom apartment - the small room close to the entrance is where my father-in-law, a geologist, sleeps in a tiny twin sized bed.  Walking into the room, one is overwhelmed with the wall to wall bookshelf filled with books, most of them having to do with geology, including the book about geology in Central Asia that he recently translated from Russian to Tajik and is very proud of.  His rock collection which was, until now, spread on different shelves now sit in one line along with 2 rocks K brought for him from Canada.  

M, K and I sleep in the biggest room of the house, probably half the size of K's room back in Vancouver. We sleep on separate mattress type bedding and use the same pillows from the living room at the end of the day. We set the mattresses on the floor every evening and put them away after waking up to make some space in the room to sit, use the computer, change and talk to each other.  Across from our room is the living room with the most prized possession, a flat screen TV with a satellite dish with quite a number of channels.  This TV was purchased after about 3 decades…the previous one being a small (probably 12 inches or so) black and white one.  This is where we eat all our meals on the floor and where M’s older brother and mother sleep at night. 

The balcony is located on the way to the kitchen.  It is covered with a red carpet with intricate designs and looks out onto the neighborhood and the numerous kids playing outside on their tricycles, with their soccer balls and skipping ropes.  The balcony also houses the refrigerator (about a quarter size of the one we had in Vancouver), potatoes, onions and a cup board with cooking utensils and dry ingredients.  It is now home to 3 of our very big and heavy suitcases until we find a home of our own. 

On the other side of the living room is the kitchen the size of our washroom in Canada equipped with a 40-year old stove and buckets of water collected when there is running water in the morning and evening.  The big blue bucket of water is meant for washing dishes, bathing (this water is warmed up on the stove before bathing) and brushing teeth.  The clear jars on the side are filled with drinking water that comes from the tap.  K is learning the distinction between the two sets of water, that water is scarce in this apartment and that we need to use it wisely and not waste it.  Keeping the water running while brushing our teeth back home has a whole new meaning now.  A new purchase that sits to one side of the kitchen is the clothes washer – K has already learned and participated in putting dirty clothes in the washer, rinsing them in the bath tub and then hanging them to dry on the balcony.  His love of washing clothes has not changed since moving across the world. 

One of my favorite moments was when K was watching his grandmother make a famous dish call mantoo (dumplings filled with meat, onions and shredded pumpkin) and wanted to make them too.  So his grandmother, who is in heaven right now with K being here and is spoiling him rotten, showed him how to roll the dough.  K’s love for cooking has also traveled with him and I’m looking forward to more moments like this. 

Next to the kitchen are two rooms – one with a toilet and the other with a bathtub.  A bucket filled with water is located at the entrance of both rooms – the one in the toilet room is used when the flush doesn’t work and one in the other room is used for brushing teeth and washing our hands.  The first time K used the washroom, M took him.  When he needed to go again a little while later, it was my turn to take him.  I was impressed with how normal the routine seemed to him when he said “this how we wash our hands here” and proceeded to walk me through the process of getting some water with a jug from the bucket, soaping up his hands with the oval shaped soap and pouring the water onto his hands. 

The hallway is where the shoes and jackets hang.  It also holds what M calls a relic – a 30 year old shoe horn.  I loved watching my father-in-law showing K how to use the shoe horn and how focused K was on the demonstration.

It has been really great being in the home where M spent his childhood and to see how comfortable and with ease K is adjusting to all the differences in living.